There is an alarming number of people I know who are disatisfied with their appearance in some way. And I’m sure you know a lot of people who feel the same way. We are unhappy with our bodies. We are unhappy with our hair. We are unhappy with our skin.
Now, I have a lot of beautiful friends and family members so when I think about the percentage of them that are unhappy with something about themselves, I’m kind of appalled. I don’t think a day goes by that I don’t hear someone complain about something that they aren’t thrilled with.
“My hair is frizzy.”
“I need to lose 5 more pounds.”
“I just need to be a little darker.”
No, no, and no. But how do you tell someone “no” without sounding like you’re just trying to be nice? Because I’m not trying to be nice; I’m being honest. Your hair looks awesome. You have a beautiful figure. You’re going to get skin cancer.
Somewhere along the way of trying to be modest, our self-esteems took a nosedive. When was the last time you received a compliment and didn’t try to explain why you don’t deserve it? Why is it so hard just to say “thank you” and really mean it?
Then there is the issue of the way women are portrayed in the media. A lot of fashion magazines are taking steps to rectify the situation now by featuring “real” body types (let’s just not forget that skinny people are real body types too. hehe). Better late than never. But still, why can’t we see the women on the covers of magazines for what they are? Beautiful, airbrushed models. We are not airbrushed models. We aren’t held to the same unfair standards. Let’s embrace that! How great is it that you can eat a cheeseburger without fearing for your job? People are not “one-size fits all”. Just be at a healthy weight for YOU.
There were things I didn’t like about myself for a long time and then one day I realized that I was the only one who cared. And you know what? I stopped caring. And it feels incredible.
That red spot on your face that you think is turning into a pimple? NOBODY ELSE NOTICES. Those new microscopic wrinkles under your eyes? NO ONE CAN SEE THEM BUT YOU. Your hair doesn’t look as good as usual? I bet it still looks pretty amazing.
Think about what you see when you look at your friends. Do you ever notice the impending zit or the new wrinkle or the out of place hair? No. And nobody notices when it happens to you either. Because you are beautiful as a whole person. You have a blemish or an imperfection? It’s beautiful because it’s a part of who you are.
If we all spend every day in the tanning bed, weigh 110 lbs, and have perfectly straight hair, then we all look alike. And there’s nothing beautiful about that.
I don’t think my friends and my family members realize how much it upsets me when they complain to me about their looks. You are insulting someone I care about! And if they could see themselves how I see them, they would realize how beautiful they are. I just wish that everyone didn’t have such a warped view of their own appearance.
So do me a favor, because I love you. The next time you’re thinking something negative about yourself, just stop. Retrain yourself to see yourself as a whole person; not a wrinkle or a few “extra” pounds or hair that won’t do what you want it to do today. No one is perfect. That would be boring and ugly.
And we just aren’t.
It’s not something that happens over night. Being happy with yourself means changing your thought process and it takes work. But you should try it. I’m not saying to stop caring about how you look, because that’s unrealistic. Just stop being so critical of yourself. You’re not so bad!